SMART Goals Parenting

Welcome!!! I am so happy you are here and want to learn how to parent healthier and easier. Or perhaps, you're not a parent but you work closely with children and want to cultivate healthier connections that reduce power struggles and disrespect. Either way, you are in the right place! This course has changed since its first conception so you may see the background or the appearance of the instructor change. Please know that changes have been made for your benefit and to account for options that are not available via this platform. The completion and understanding of all lessons is recommended for best results. 

SMART goals are Specific, Measurable, Applicable, Relevant and Timely.

This parenting course differs from all others by identifying SMART goals. By having SMART goals the desired outcome becomes more repeatable across larger populations. Unclear goals like "I want my kids to be happy" and "I want my kids to live a good life" are easily lost in a present moment of intense emotions. However, having a goal of "I want my child to learn how to make good choices" makes achieving those other goals possible AND it is a guiding light when managing current stressors with your child. Your child learning how to make good choices is the second goal.

The first goal is for you, the parent, to become a respected figure for your child. The majority of this course focuses on teaching you how to be your child's respected figure. By being the respected figure (also referred to as the authority figure) you will earn your child's trust and s/he will allow you to guide without opposition. Imagine that... parenting without arguments, power struggles, tantrums or disrespect. It's not a dream, this is how I have parented for 30 years. Now you can too!

SMART Goals Parenting is founded in Attachment theory by John Bowlby and Abraham Maslow's hierarchy of needs.  These theories together create emotional safety in the home which eliminates power struggles and builds trust.

Fear and love are opposing forces that cannot occupy the same space at the same time. This means, every time you act out of fear no one feels your love. The only things felt are what fear produces- insecurity, rejection, unappreciation and  criticism. Learn how to recognize and conquer your fears so they don't become a barrier to your love being received.

Think in terms of the airline warning, "Should the oxygen masks fall from the ceiling, secure your own mask first before helping others." Before you can give to others you must first fill yourself. People are often short tempered when they are overwhelmed and faced with having more to do. The best way to avoid tempers flying and angry words being exchanged is to make sure you have what you need to feel calm and patient. Your reaction greatly influences the message received.

If you can only do one thing in this course then let this be the one. Consistency impacts your child's emotional stability, self-confidence and sense of empowerment.

Choices is the first of the four parts of effective discipline- choices, consequences, rewards, reinforce (CCRR for short). Discipline is often the area where parents lose it. Undesired behavior can catch parents off guard triggering an anxiety reaction that hinders your ability to think clearly and problem solve. Even when you anticipate a tantrum or power struggle you may still feel lost in how to resolve it quickly and perhaps quietly. These lessons are designed to equip you and your partner with skills to address discipline calmly and effectively while maintaining emotional safety for all parties. Compromising emotional safety for the sake of a quick resolution can have lasting damage on your parent-child relationship. Rather than exploring options to repair damage, let's focus on not needing to cause the damage in the first place. If your parent-child relationship has already suffered damage utilizing these skills presented in all lessons will help but please seek out a professional if you need more assistance.